Rollerblading in February: Epic Fail (February 2010)

Sometimes harsh winters of the north make people a little crazy. At any sign of it ending, people here take advantage and I was no different. This was our first winter; RD was about 8 months old. It had been sunny for a couple of days in a row and pretty darn warm for the end of February (in the upper 20s F), so the road leading to RCMP point was about half bare black top. I was feeling so good and hopeful of spring that Saturday that I took RD for a run outside. As it takes him more than a measly run (I’m no marathoner) to tire him out (and behave) I had an idea on the last leg of it.

I skipped down the steps to the basement and dug out my old rollerblades that I hadn’t worn in at least 5 years. I figured it would be a great way to enjoy the day and get RD really tired at the same time. I had to drive a little ways on the road as there was still ice and snow everywhere until that beautiful length of black.

As I strapped the blades on and we got going, I was totally exhilarated. The dog loved it, he was running and I was sailing along behind him. “I AM THE DOG WHISPERER!,” I thought and threw my face up to the sun and laughed an almost maniacal laughter.  I got to the stop sign of the main road and turned around. I was crazy, but not enough so to go into traffic with RD at the reins.

When we were getting close to the Jeep, we passed the road that led to the only other houses on the point. This was always the point where we saw 3 of RD’s mortal enemies. Two yellow dogs (which I’m pretty sure are his brothers) and a big black Shepherd mix with haunting blue eyes. Usually I can yell from a distance and they scram, but that day was different. The dogs kind of came at us and RD was having none of it. He started snarling and charging towards them. I did not want to let go of the leash as RD would not have a chance against all 3. This worked until we hit the line where the bare road met the thick ice. I don’t exactly remember the order of events during the next few seconds that felt like minutes, but it went something like this:

Needless to say, the brakes on the blades were not sufficient. While we were barrelling along the left side of the road I saw a vehicle coming from our compound. The dogs were a little ways ahead on the right side of the road. Just as RD started to cross over, the road met the ice and I literally flew into the air. As I landed HARD flat on my belly with my arms out in front of me and my legs splayed to the sides, I dropped the leash. RD kept going. As I looked up to the left, the vehicle coming screeched to a stop in front of me. It was someone Ryan worked with. He and his wife kindly laughed at me and drove around me still on the ground. Thanks, a**holes.  RD had gotten to the dogs and they were snarling and nipping. As it turned into a real fight, I was lurching over screaming the kind of ugly scratchy scream that could make a child cry. The dogs knew I meant business and retreated. RD sat whining in the opposite ditch and refused to move. Only his foolish pride was hurt, but still I had to trudge in rollerblades in snow up to my knees to drag him back to the Jeep. We went home and I cancelled out my run with a beer.

The rollerblades have not seen sunshine since that day.

Not a common scene in our house.